a mediocre dreamer

i'm sad to be back in berkeley and even more sad to be studying so soon after my glorious spring break of doing absolutely nothing. i'm reverting back to the primitive days of simple pleasures: sleeping, eating, and breathing.

i did, however, abandon my neanderthalism to enjoy 1.5 days of fun with the fat guys #1 and #4, kristy and kwan. this blog is in honor of fat guy #1, the notorious brainiac jahndee. she should win a genius award for the following reasons:

1. for nearly 21 years of her life jahndee has believed that hello kitty is a rat... nevermind the fact that all merchandise say hello KITTY.
2. jahndee spent 30 minutes fascinated by the fact that the beach in monterey is part of the same ocean as the beaches in soCal, then she went on to spend another 10 minutes in disbelief that the same ocean that touches pusan, korea is also the pacific ocean in which we get to splash about.
3. to her dismay, kwan does not live in a log cabin and nor did john steinbeck, and salinas is still part of california

unfortunately i cannot remember all the other spotlight moments, but it was a unanimous decision that jahndee was the queen of the day. she must have had her eyes closed throughout 2nd grade social science and throughout her years at whitney and berkeley for that matter =) all in all i think we had a successful road/day-trip. even as i blog i'm thinking of reverting back to a journal because who knows how long this site will last. brief highlights of our excursion:

-wendy's and pilot gas on our delayed drive up. sewon professing her not being hungry yet eating a hot dog and chocolate donuts. true fat guy.
-being the most excited 4 ppl in salinas, according to kwan, as we romped around john steinbeck's house at 2am
-disputing about bras while kwan hid in the bathroom. sewon in denial about her size and jahndee's disappointed glance at the flat joe boxer sign on her roomy shirt.
-horse-back riding on the beach and sewon's fat guy horse that was too lazy to follow the rest of us.
-cannery row, the fish hopper restaurant, cheap silver jewelry, and the pretty ocean
-monterey bay aquarium where the sea otters stole the show by far
-17mile drive and the lone cypress that isn't so alone after all
-toy store in carmel with the softest dolls ever
-white sandy beach with a pretty sunset
-dinner in sweaters and jeans at the nice tarpys. can we say fat?

thank you guys for a lovely time. we must do it again.

i often find myself in situations where i have absolutely no tangible power to do anything, slowly waning away at the mercy of the tides... this is where faith provides an anchor and God-willing i will hold on until He reveals the meaning of it all.

prayer is a powerful thing.

had a really good day today:

-had french class outside to bask in the warmth of the sun
-got my midterm back with pleasing results
-successfully completed a puzzle at games of berkeley WITHOUT the help of the misleading fred
-super dc: eating & chatting with lil jenny, amanda, fred, and albert for 2+ hours
-cosmic bowling with ppl fit with fred's butterfly dance to top the night off
-8 mile with the freshies, kwan, and jahndee

thanks guys. this was one of the most relaxing days i've had all semester.

sigh, there was a time when i could have a fluent and thorough conversation with my mama in korean, but now i find english feeding off my speech limitations like a leech. apparently college has stripped me of more than my self-esteem... it went ahead and left me mute.

enlightening excerpt of the day
the philosopher H.P. Grice labeled the idea of cooperative principle, which is the conversational principle to make your contributions to conversation at the required time and for the accepted purpose of the talk exchange. He lists the following four maxims that must be honored if the cooperative principle is to operate effectively:

1. the maxim of quantity: speak neither more nor less than is required.
2. the maxim of quality: speak the truth and avoid falsehood.
3. the maxim of relevance: speak in a relevant and informative way.
4. the maxim of clarity: speak so as to avoid obscurity and ambiguity.

case in point: although i've lost a lot of my korean, i am still at an advantage to males who, i conclude, have the conversational conventions of a tree.

JUDwhaEE: are u at mewon's?
JUDwhaEE: ah it's freezin gat my place!
JUDwhaEE: hurry up heater!
s URF cloud 9: hhaahah
s URF cloud 9: she's freakin sleeping
s URF cloud 9: i'm supposed to wake her up but you know how successful THAT can be
JUDwhaEE: hahahahha
JUDwhaEE: go pokeher
JUDwhaEE: "fat guy!"
JUDwhaEE: "wake up fat guy!"
JUDwhaEE: "i have icecream...."
JUDwhaEE: then maybe she'll respond
JUDwhaEE: "huh? u do....eh??:
s URF cloud 9: hahahahhahahahhahah
s URF cloud 9: blog-worthy comments...

ah, sewon. you fat guy wake up! this is getting to be a nasty little habit, you sleeping everytime i'm at your place.

so there i was, a pile of blobbage on the bed with my head hanging over the side munching on turkey jerky, taken aback by the fact that though i was swallowing upside-down my food was still making its way down my esophagus and i was still able to choke on a piece of it... all thanks to the fascinating phenomena of peristalsis. ask me to show you the dance i made up in honor of this marvel.

and so it begins... this world is so in need of God.

it's 6:30am on a saturday morning and i have just come back from one of the most action-packed nights since i've been back in berkeley. the night has left me speechless in so many ways but for the sake of memories, i'll do my best to put my thoughts into words. silly me, my mind is so simple that i had to write down all the exciting things that happened so i wouldn't forget anything when it came time for me to sit and blog.

anyhow, let's start off with POTCH. i'm sure i speak for everyone when i say it was such a blessed event. every single act that went on blew me away. the talents and gifts God has poured out upon each person were working at full force. it was amazing and saying anything more would simply taint it. i was humbled and blessed, nervous and relieve, shocked and humoured... every possible reaction a person could contain in one night, minus any bad feelings. thanks to all the thespians because it was a night to remember, most definitely =)

afterwards, a bunch of us gathered at lil jenny's place to play and games and bevel in our joy of the night. we played three for all, simpsons clue, and taboo (the classic). the highlight of this time had to be when we decided to put a korean twist to taboo. roy and kwan were front and center in their own stage of mockery as we delighted in their effortful interpretations of the korean language. kwan and his sah-too-li, roy and his eloquent "nah-bbun-sah-lam"... maybe you had to be there, but for those of you who were, need i say more? good times, good laughs.

speed scrabble should be police-taped off to college students cuz once you dive in, there ain't no turning back. 4 straight hours didn't even make us flinch. jahndee, sewon, esther, lil jenny, kwan, roy, and i played till the wee hours of the morning conjuring up the most creative of punishments in my opinion. ask roy to give an encore performance because his acting like a drunken, blind walrus with rabies courting the tv with a special dance is something not to be missed. also, steer clear of sewon who does some freakishly weird impression of a dog with rabies and a broken leg... she was supposed to attack esther, the whale who was hopelessly beached and giving birth. it was hilarious just coming up with the idea but a grand applause for those academy-award winning performances. other highlights were roy's hot sauce punishment simmered down with ice cream, esther's admiration of the scent of raid, and oh i must not forget jahndee's intellectual inquiries about the word G-NAW (gnaw) and CO-AT (coat)... yes, she was honestly confused at the words with her version of the pronunciation and yes, this IS the product of a whitney and berkeley education. go jahndee, two thumbs up!

it was a delightful evening/night/dusk. i was thoroughly thoroughly blessed. thank you God for being sovereign and thank you God for good times like these. now time for me to contract and crunch these tires of mine until i go have breakfast with my sweet linda. let's be honest though, you'll probably find me on the floor drooling in about 2 minutes. toodles anyway.

thank God for the gift of endurance cuz I HAVE SURVIVED! on a less brighter note typing in my name on google came up with 26,800 hits. i guess i'm not as unique as i'd like to be. amazingly enough hit #2 and #7 totally sum up my interests: karenleedanceinternational and karenleecooking. i'm speechless. all i need is a karenleeMD or karenleeNP to finish put the cherry right on top of my sundae of awe. which brings me to my next point... whilst cramming itty bitty pieces of knowledge into my brain i couldn't stop thinking about cooking. i was actually craving the moment where i could throw everything aside and run in slow-motion to my eagerly awaiting kitchen. it was drawing me in with an unexplainable force. part of me wants to believe it's my true calling to be a chef but lest i want to send my dad on a trip to the psychiatric ward, i shall believe otherwise. honestly though i still do love the idea of immersing myself in medicine. if you think about it, the two have a lot in common (cooking and med, i mean). both require the skillful hands and proper technique and a whole lot of get-yourself-messy-and-dive-in spirit. it's in my very nature. while normal little girls played with barbi? i was out digging for worms and operating on snails. while my sisters played tea party? i was out tending to my numerous cuts and wounds with an innate sense of medical ethnobotany. i was born for this.

the kitchen beckons me... and i'm off!

sugar-free redbull is the best invention ever. all the pep without the fat.
in other words, i could kick myself in the head for wasting time.

it's a wonder how pretty underwear can make you feel like a whole new person!

had a dream i was back in paris. i was sad to wake up.

"mong mong mong" kang ah ji mal hat dah. okay! i think it's all done karen (= let me know if you want me to change anything. do you want nedstat? any more links?

"a moment on the lips is a lifetime on the hips"
-from a Lulu Guinness designer purse

i can't sleep in my bed until it's made. so on a busy day when i wake up late and don't make my bed and then don't come home till late, i make my bed and then get right into it to sleep. i wonder if ppl would find that strange.

i can only imagine what it will be like
when i walk by Your side
i can only imagine what my eyes will see
when Your face is before me
i can only imagine... i can only imagine

surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
will i dance for you jesus or in awe of You be still
will i stand in your presence, to my knees will i fall
will i sing hallelujah, will i be able to speak at all
i can only imagine... i can only imagine

i can only imagine when that day comes
and i find myself standing in the Son
i can only imagine when all i will do
is forever, forever worship You
i can only imagine... i can only imagine.