a mediocre dreamer

it's verging on 4 weeks since i've moved here. all i can think about is how much God has provided for me through it all. if ever i've sat before a meal and felt truly thankful to be able to pay for it, it's now. if ever i've looked at my surroundings and wanted to cry and laugh, it's now. if ever i've been so grateful to meet a friend, it's now.

i feel like i've been running. straying from that one-dimensional korean-american christian bubble, for the better, i'm convinced... but into what? a jaded, deeply self-seeking reality? there must be a balance.

I have come to this ocean
And the waves of fear are starting to grow
The doubts and questions are rising with the tide
So I'm clinging to the one sure thing I know

I will hold on to the hand of my Savior
And I will hold on with all my might
I will hold loosely to things that are fleeting
And hold on to Jesus
I will hold on to Jesus for life

I've tried to hold many treasures
They just keep slipping through my fingers like sand
But there's one treasure that means more than breath itself
So I'm clinging to it with everything I am

Like a child holding on to a promise
I will cling to His word and believe
As I press on to take hold of that
for which Christ Jesus took hold of me

Hold on for life

-Steven Curtis Chapman